Student Teaching Jitters

Okay, so I'm really freaking out about student teaching. There's so much to be done before I go back to Maine, and then before I go back to TEACH...gaaaaaah, nerves are jumpin'

I'm in Borders right now, and I'm looking over the Student Teacher Handbook. These are the things that I'm freaking out about on this 48-numbered "Responsibilities of the Student Teacher" list that is THREE PAGES LONG (10pt. Times New Roman Font, and the numbers are in no particular order):

1. Obtain a scope and sequence of subject matter for the 15 week period if possible (which means assuming one subject a week).
2. Accept increased responsibilities over the 15 weeks.
3. The cooperating teacher needs to approve ALL lessons at least 24 hours prior to student teachers teaching them.
4. Be responsible for the entire classroom by week 14 (including any drills or unexpected classroom problems).

Those four things are FREAKING me out. It's not because I can't do those things, I certainly can, and without trouble, it's just those things are huge things that are scary.

I'm trying to focus on things that are just as challenging, but not as scary; for instance, being prepared before the students come into the classroom. I'm the queen of doing that.



Anyway, the store is closing soon...I just wanted to share my nerves with the whole world.

Update/Trip of the Year

I know I know, I haven't blogged in...well.. a long time, but I'm back, at least for one time before I go back to school.

*Sighs* Okay. A lot has happened since I blogged last, and I'd like to share. So let's start, shall we?

I got more working hours, and worked almost everyday in July, which was good. At church, I cantored three times in a row, so I guess they like me :-) . Fr. Leo, an Australian priest who has known my family for a few years came up to see us. The trip was okay except for the migranes I kept getting. It seems like I always have to be on my best behavior when Fr. Leo comes, which isn't a bad thing, but I don't want to have him think of my family as...I don't know... disgraceful? I can't think of any other word. I just don't want him to look down on us.

After Fr. Leo left for New York, which was probably his millionth stop on his trip, I had about a day and a half to pack for my own vacation.

Of course, my vacation was to see Jake. Duh. (okay, Valley Girl moment is done) As always, being with Jake made me feel whole again; like the only thing that matters is us.

Okay, enough with the sappy stuff. Basically the trip went like this:

First, I flew on Southwest. One pilot was drunk. I'm sure of it.

I got to the Indianapolis International Airport earlier that I expected. When I called Jake after I got to the baggage claim, I saw him walking around looking for me. He went around me twice before he saw me. I'm guessing that's a good sign; that I looked too good to be me. Anyway, we headed for Steak n' Shake then...mmmmmm I love that place. Good food and great prices. We then went to Wal-Mart to look for True Blood. I bought it for Jake as a not-so-birthday present. OOh then we went into GameStop and I beat his score at archery. Hehe.

Wednesday, I spent the morning with Carol, Jake's mom. That woman has so much strength, and I don't know how she lives with 4 boys all the time. She drove me to Jake's work where I was then passed around to different departments of the hotel to meet everyone that Jake works with. Everyone except the General Manager it seemed like, haha. We met up with Sari, one of our good friends, and her daughter, Abby (who is, I must say, the cutest 1 year old I've met in a long time), and later Kevin, Sari's husband. It was really nice to be around them since I haven't seen them in almost two years. After lunch, Jake and I hit the road for Cincinnati.

I think the best part of the trip, for me anyway, was there; we had cheap Chinese, swam in the pool and just were goofing around (no, not THAT way...perves..). I loved just hanging out with him, and Jake even got a free Club sandwich out of it.

Thursday, we had breakfast and headed to the Creation Museum in northern Kentucky. I'll have pictures up later, I swear. Probably after I get back to school. It was a great place to go, and I learned a different aspect of my faith. We had lunch there, and then we headed to Norris City, where Jake grew up. It rained all the way down; well, no it didn't. It was sun for 20 minutes, then rain for an hour, and then sun, and the cycle would start again.

Once we got down to Illinois, we had amazing pizza and then we stopped at Jake's grandmother's, and his uncle's house. There I learned the real definition of "Bless Your Heart" and it's not a good one. Oh well. I got to beat up Jake everytime he said it to me. That was fun. We then went to Jake's cousin's house, and stayed there for a while. Then we went to Jake's cousin's parent's house. It's weird, don't ask; but they're great people, and I enjoyed every minute I spent with them.

Friday, we spent the first part fo the day just taking care of the kids (Samantha, Tyler, and little Tori), and then went down to Grandma's to bring our stuff down and just relax and spend time with her for a while. Then, we went and grabbed Jake's friends Buckman and Corey. By the time we got back to Norris City to pick up Sam, Jake's cousin, I already was dead of laughter. Bless my heart.

We went down to Evansville, IN, and we went to dinner and then to an arcade/laser tag place. I wasn't last place at laser tag at least, and I did hit Jake more than he hit me. :-D I'm pretty proud of that fact. After laser tag, and Corey winning 1 ticket at Deal or No Deal, we had ice cream at Coldstone, and headed back to Norris City. I then took the bed while Jake slept on the couch, and went to sleep.

The next morning, Saturday, Jake and I said bye to Grandma and then headed back to Noblesville. We got back at a reasonable time, and then got ready for the....Dave Matthews Concert. Which was amazing. That band can really play. I mean REALLY play. Cassie then called me about a half hour before the concert ended. Jake tried to leave her a message. It didn't work. Haha Baby...I was right. You needed to press 1.

Sunday, we got up for Mass, which was the weirdest Mass I've ever been to. And then we went to Wal-Mart and met up with Boje, one of Jake's...acquaintances, I guess you could call him. Sunday we just hung out at home adn had a good Turkey dinner.

Monday was the hardest, but I pulled through and didn't lose it till the very end, when I had to say that I loved him and goodbye.

Okay that took me about an hour to write because everything was just such a blur. It went so fast, and I wish I had just took more time to do things with him. Like I said before, I feel whole when I'm with him. It's not that I don't feel whole when I'm not with Jake, but it's like there's an actual hole that created itself, and when I'm not with him, it's filled up with memories and the love I get from all my friends and family; but you can still tell there's a hole. When I'm with Jake, it's like that hole doesn't exist. At all. *sighs*

So that has been my life this past summer. I've got two weeks left of work, and then I'm sort of done, and I need to pack my life for college, which takes me SO long...at least most of it is in the same boxes and stuff.

I've been bad and not talked to anyone this summer, and I'm so sorry for that. Hopefully you'll all forgive me when I get back.

*muah!* love you all

CPL and Teaching Goals

There was supposed to be a reason for this blog...even a subject. And now I can't remember.

Well, I guess it'll come to me later. I'm in the Concord Public Library working on wireless internet. Yes, ladies and gents, I've finally found a place where wifi is free for me to use and is quiet so I can concentrate. Right now I'm in what's called "The Study Room" (dun dun dunnnnnn)...It's a room with tables and shelves of medical books. I'm in a corner of the room, but at the same time I'm in a corner, I can see most of where the good places are for me to have a little more privacy for furture reference. I would stay here each time I go onto my computer, but it's wicked hot in this particular spot, and people like to stare. For example, right now: there are two really greasy looking guys who can't breathe out of their nose, and one more, they're breathing loudly out of their mouth...staring at me. If there wasn't a librarian around the corner, I would move. But all in all, I like my spot for the night.

When I was walking here I was thinking about the whole summer, and what I was going to do in the library to have an excuse to come in here and work on my laptop. I was thinking that I would maybe look at books for my students next semester. Maybe then, I can be semi-prepared for what I'm going to see. I'm 85% positive that I'm going to start teaching in the classroom the first day because of my teacher (I've worked with her before). But at the same time, I don't know who my supervisor is going to be; well...scratch that. I think it'll be Dr. Rey. But I don't know how she feels about me teaching on the first day without any observation.

So I've come up with some things I want to do with the students; not content-based things, but I can weave content into them. They're more like goals for myself so I can hopefully get a good interview lined up.

First goal: Create an iMovie or whatever's on a PC, that shows my work with the students.
Second goal: Mrs. Malnati has a website for her classroom, and she hasn't done a lot with it, so I want to take it over and put updates and (with parent permission) put photos of the students showing off their work.
Third goal: I want to use the different stuff I have for bulletin board making and really create good-looking boards.
Fourth goal: One of my assignments for student teaching is to do reflections every night. I also want to put my reflections on another blog for preservice teachers to see what student teaching is like. Maybe Dr. Rey (hopefully) will count those future blog entries as actual reflections...or part of them anyway.

Well, I guess that's it for now. There's the Shakespeare Room upstairs that I want to check out.

ttfn

A Fiddler on the Roof

Recently, a lot of theological thoughts have been jumping around me lately. Jake just finished his theology class, and had asked me questions about certain things in Catholicism. Mr. Livernois just told me that Laura just left her husband (who was Muslim), and that made me think of the talk she and I had about why she converted to Islam (because when she was Catholic, she fell in love with the process and traditions, which is why she wanted more…hence Islam). I just finished watching an episode of House where a Hassidic Jew was about to have a kidney torn off of her body, and she still wanted to have a Sabbath meal with her husband.

What got me thinking is why we have so many traditions in the world. In the musical “Fiddler on the Roof,” the main character, Tevye explains that without his Jewish traditions, his life would be as shaky as a fiddler on the roof. The whole musical is based around the concept of meshing a life of change and a life of traditions.

Can we really bring our traditions to the world we live in? I don’t know about any other religion, but I know there’s a movement in the Catholic Church to be more…well…traditional. Some of the things that are coming back are good: a renewal of chastity, a simpler life, etc. But there are some things that I don’t think could transpose into the world as we know it, like a Latin Mass, or the belief that women should become like Kirsten Dunst in Mona Lisa Smile BEFORE she got divorced. Out off all of our traditions, do we have to give up the ones we don’t want anymore? Is that even fair?

I think we hold onto traditions because they are comforting. I know that being Catholic, for me, is challenging, but it’s comforting too. I don’t think I could give that up. Even though my past isn’t very interesting, those Catholic traditions are what keeps me close to God.
Every time I watch “My Big Fat Greek Wedding,” I can relate to Tula so much, but one of the things that I question is what Tula feels about being Greek Orthodox. Does she hate it, and that’s partly why she’s unhappy? Or is it because she has no life and when she gets one, God rewards her? It seems like she’s indifferent, and maybe that’s why I don’t understand that part of her; it doesn’t matter to her about her family traditions.

The movie, in my opinion, is a good representation of what’s going on in the world these days. People are comforted by their traditions, but at the same time, they know that those same traditions are considered “old-fashioned” in society, which leaves us with a question for ourselves.

Are we the people to keep or to toss away our traditions? What traditions are worth keeping and others thrown away?

I feel like a fiddler.

Update/Summer Posts

Okay, okay, I know. I haven't written in a while, and I don't have a good excuse. Well, wait a second. Not a lot has happened since my last post, so there wasn't really anything to write about.

So I first want to start with my grades:
Exceptionality: B
US History: C+
Math Methods: B
Internship: A-
Social Studies Methods: A-

So these grades are about what I predicted in my last post. I should have done a lot better in US History, and I do admit that I really slacked off in that class. I kind of regret that I didn't do the best I could. I just couldn't focus, and I could have studied a lot more.

So Wednesday came and went and then the Senior Days were upon me...this is a record that I need to remember that Bon Appetit has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to eat, so I need money after Wednesday.

Senior days were sort of lonely, and so John kinda kept me from staying in my room sulking/wanting to go home. I hung out with him on Thursday adn Friday, and my parents came to pick me up Saturday.

When I got home, it was sort of a let down to tell you the truth. I really wanted to be back in Maine. I think that was because part of me doesn't want college to end, and when I go back, it will end. I mean, I want it to end, but I want my transition into the big wide world an easy one. As much as I want it, I know it's not going to happen.

After about a week of boredom, I decided that I needed to get out of the house for the day, and I went up to see John. He made Taco Pie for his family. I didn't know if I was going to like it, but I tried it and yeah, it's not something that I would want every night, but hey, it was good.

I started to cantor at Church again. It feels so good that I get to show people what I feel for God and to show them how I use my talents for God.

I've also gone to the Concord Library for the first time in a long time and I found interesting things there. This is the list:

1. There's wireless, and since I get crappy wireless at home, I think it'll be a good thing for me.
2. Their children's room is amazing for teachers and parents.
3. The Shakespeare Room has always past me, and I would now like to explore that room; see what the Bard wants to show me. :-)
4. I can now check out my books without my Mom. :-)
5. Minerva at SJC is the same system as the one in Concord Library.
   

So now I'm here just hanging for a while, since work hasn't really picked up yet. But it will...oh it will.

Finals Week and the Summer

Okay, so my finals this week are starting off pretty good. I have two more finals on Wednesday, and then I'm singing on Friday. Saturday is graduation and I'm leaving to go back to New Hampshire then.

I can't wait to be off this campus, but next year is looming, and it's starting to set in that college will end eventually, and change will need to happen. I remember when I needed to transition as a freshman in college, and let me tell ya, that was WICKED hard. But I honestly think that transitioning into the real world will be easier than my transition into college. At least I'll know people around me, and now that I'm thinking of it, I can always be a sub for anyone at PCC, so at least I'll have a job to fall back on.

But that's next year. I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

Everyone hates finals, and I, myself are included in everyone, but I think finals get a bad rep for being the most evil pieces of paper known to man. Seriously, they're there to prove to us we know our stuff, or prove that we didn't pay attention in class. If you tried in your classes, finals will be easier than you expect. If you didn't try, then they'll be REALLY hard.

Predicted grades:

Exceptionality: B+ or A-
Math Methods: B- or B
Social Studies Methods: B or B+
Internship: A-
U.S.History II: C

The Year Coming to an End

Another year went by. My junior year seemed to go by extremely slow, but extremely quick. Why both? First semester dragged, and second semester came WAY too soon. So I've decided to rack my brain and think about what I'

What I've learned:

• You CAN write a unit in less than a week, but I would advise against it.
• I ought to keep my mouth shut and just watch other people ruin their lives.
• Friends come and go, but with a precious few, I need to hold on.
• I need to get to know my parents more.
• Middle school is NOT pour moi!
• Support systems are a must, because if you don't have a support system, you're never going to get anything done
• Classroom Management should have been a required class BEFORE our Math Internship.
  
• Math is NOT my strong point, but I feel a lot more comfortable with teaching it now.
• My character in the play is on crack.
  
• Momma Mac is a better mom to Ursula than her own mother is. At least she doesn't faint in front of Conrad Birdie.
  
• Do. Not. Panic.
  
• I really want to go to New York sometime soon.
  

And the big realization of this semester:

I'm ready to teach!

Welcome to Saint Joseph's High School!

Here, students preparing for the workforce learn the snobbiness, bitchiness, and cattiness needed to survive in New England.

You first start off with classes full of competition and sabotage, such as Biology or Chemistry. These classes are full of students who love to watch others fail. Students learn quickly that coffee is a must to get through the day, and frequently are rude to those who do not wish to partake in caffine. This is why we encourage drinking just coffee in classes!

The cafeteria, full of frenemies, is loaded with stuffy foods you would only find in the 5-star restaurants! Certainly there isn't any normal food around. What do you take us for?

At the lunch table, the rolling of eyes at others sitting with you is encouraged. Gossiping behind others' backs after they have left to get to their classes is common.

And on the weekends, feel free to stay on campus and partake in alcohol consumption. You never know whose room you will wake up in!

After long days making sure you're on top, you can semi-relax in individual torture rooms called dorms. You can converse with others who are in the same room with you, as well as hearing the thumps from above you indicating more than torture is ensuing.



Thank you for listening to my satire rant. I've had a really bad day. Yeah.

Oh, Spring Fling <3

Just a quick note.

So here I am in the Heff, "working" on my paper for Math class because I left my grid for my unit in my room and I'm too lazy to get it, while others are on a drinking spree, toppling over in drunkeness.

This is what happens: I get stressed, start to work, and then when I realize I don't have to, I stop working. :-) Yeah. I know I'm screwing myself over.

I found sources for my paper, and will probably start reading them so I can form my thesis,but I probably wont even start my paper today. I'm such a procrastinator.

No one really knows if she's drunk or if she's stoned...

Tonight, College Awards night is going on. I'm on the list of Who's Who in American Colleges and Universities, so I'm being honored. My parents are coming up for it, and I'm just, well, humbled. I can't believe that I'm one of those students. I know that I should be gracious adn say thank you, but seriously...I shouldn't be honored like this. I mean, I'm grateful for the honored, but there are PLENTY of people who deserve it more than I do.

I got some good news today. My unit due date got pushed back to Friday!! That means I have a better chance of getting it done, AND I can prioritize better.

The play is going well, although we're all pretty worn out because of the energy. I don't think people have realized that they're putting a lot of physical energy into rehearsals because everyone that I've seen today looks exhausted. And they feel exhausted.

I think that's it, but I might blog later tomorrow (which is my GET TO WORK day) :-)

Heck, ya.

Wow, I'm finally on Blogger. I know, about time, right?

Okay, so I figured I'd name this blog "Overdramatic" because that's what I am. I take things too seriously, and I make mountains out of mole hills. Eh. It's my life.

I'm going to be complaining about my life for the rest of this blog. Just to let you know. It's probably the reason why I signed up for blogger now, in internship, then later on. I just have a lot to do, and I'm worrying.

I am wicked poor right now. I literally have 16 dollars in my bank account (like Erin Brockovich. I've always wanted to do that monologue in a play).

And that's another thing. I've been in plays since high school, and just once I want to be a dramatic character. I think I'd like to play someone who isn't funny. I need to get away from funny. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for the part I have in the play, and I know that it's a good fit for me (I'm Ursula in Bye Bye Birdie.), but it's just that I want to get away from comedic performances for a while, and see if I can work with dramatic characters.

Umm let's see. I was the only one who failed a test yesterday. That felt great. I dented my car this morning.

I have a six-week unit that I've only done lesson plans for one week so far due, AND a 3-5 page paper due on the same day for different professors. Plus it's spring fling this weekend, so I'll be surrounded by drunks trying to get sex from other drunk people.

SO yeah. FML.

I feel better now.